5 Months later....

5 Months ago I started this blog, due to different circumstances it was put to one side, but now Sir has requested I begin writing again so here I am.
  So much has happened since then, I tried an office job again and failed and in regards to our bdsm play we have tried quite a few different things.. needle play, public play, we brought a riding crop,we have been to several munches and decided we were better suited to Master and Slave than submissive and dominant for lots of reasons I will touch upon another time. There have been some tremendous arguments too! and all the while our love has grown stronger. The arguments only ever came from a frustration that our everyday routines brought, Sir wanting to control, I was confused and needed to submit, so here we are Master and Slave, something we have always deeply desired.

I must serve my Master in the best way I can every day, and show him the up most respect, he wont punish me by beating me as this would be a reward, I know he will punish me by ignoring me and that's the worst of all. Some of the rules have changed since January so I will update them, however most evolved into our everyday routine, and some just didn't work. What I did learn in the last 5 months and why I believe I am a slave is that my desire to serve is stronger than ever. I also had to learn to let go in many ways, when I first arrived on the bdsm scene 2 years ago I wanted to 'play' every other day, all the the time, I expected play, I predicted what would happen, anticipated and grew upset if my expectations were not met. Now I do not expect,but I submit to what Sir has in mind for me or wants and I go with the moment, and I trust that he will look after me. Gradually my mind has changed from being focused on my own needs to start to now be shaped by pleasing another.I also have a deep need to be controlled and guided by Sir, and to serve him.
I am his property, he owns me and I will obey him always. The most important element of my service to my Master is RESPECT, and he has highlighted this again and again.

However I am far from perfect and make mistakes all the time,but I hope they become minimal.

The picture at the top of the post is one of my poor bruised bottom after a heavy session with the flogger and riding crop. I love it as the bruises look like an atlas : )